Hey Indiana, we have a problem...

"And if you complain once more, you will meet an army of me"




On June 21st, 2011, I was 326 lbs.
As of January 13th, 2012, I am 269 lbs.

I have hit a rough patch the size of Indiana. I have excuses all over the place, but my lack of progress is my own doing. But I need to vent at this exact moment, SO-

A. I can't find a job. I have applied to several welding jobs but all I hear is how unqualified I am. I had a temp service call me up and say they had my resume, and we're wondering if I was still looking for a welding job. YUP! So I drive a half hour south to see them, create an online account, fill out online application, online skills and abilities worksheet, online personality quiz, and anything else I can possibly fill out online to save them some actual paperwork. After ALL of that. I had to redo every single effing thing... ON PAPER!! Anyway, they had my resume in hand and called me. After about hour and a half filling and refilling out info, they give me a drug screen, and finally the interview. It was a short interview. I didn't have the qualifications for any of their available jobs. Thanks for coming down though.
... What?
For the previous year, I was a prized welder on 2nd shift a steel mill. They needed three welders to replace me. So I applied at a steel mill here that was looking for 2nd shift welders. Not. Effing. Qualified.
WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE???

B. Trying to go back to school, working on financial aid, they want a copy of my taxes to verify income. I got my loans out of default, and the school tells me I need a letter of good standing from the lender. OK. Lender says go to this page, print this off, it's exactly what you need. OK. I take it to the school. No, we need a actual letter stating that you are in good standing. NOT OK. I look at the sheet, then ask this says I am in repayment. Doesn't that mean good standing? She says no, that just means you are making payments on your loan (Really? Thanks for the clarification). I say check the NSLDS site, the site that told you I am in default, it will tell you I'm not on default. She says they can't check it (WTF?). I then reverify, 'But you will check to verify I am IN default though?' Yes. I was being sarcastic. So I call the lender. We repeat the entire conversation above, and walk back in to talk to them again. Him in one ear, we are both listening to her and he starts laughing on the phone about the situation. LAUGHING because there is nothing you can say to stupid. I managed to get over them to their director, she apologized and couldn't answer why the letter I had that showed I was in repayment wasn't clear enough for her staff. Well thank you for your help.
Just when I think all is clear, now I have to take ANOTHER copy of my taxes RE-VERIFY my income with the school.
WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE???

C. I, for the first time in my life, have been kicked out of a restaurant. Why you might ask? Well allow me to present the conversation to you.
Server- Welcome to Black Sparrow, do you guys need food menus?
Me- No I think we know what we want.
S- Oh. Ok. What can I get you to drink?
M- Two diets please.
S- Can I see your ID's?
M- I'm sorry?
S- I need to see your ID's.
M- I actually left mine at home. Are you seriously ID'ing us for diet cokes?
S- If you don't have it you can't be here.
M- Are you kicking us out?
S- Yup.
WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE???

I was walking across a parking lot road today. Three steps in a I hear a car speed up. I look to my left, and here comes a mom with her son in the passenger seat fly by, mirror less than two feet from me. Really, mom? REALLY???

The gas company will fire employees who walk into houses where dogs aren't confined in a cage or separate room. You're kidding right? No. No he wasn't. He was one foot off the porch talking to me to clarify for whoever (if anyone) was watching.

I was informed to join the Wabash Runners club or whatever it is called. Please someone, is that thing serious? It is a organized meeting point without a meeting time. They meet Saturday's. Some at 6, some at 8, others come at 10 or 12. What good does that do? I want to train with people, not gallop aimlessly through a morning probably by myself.

Went to get my license information switch to this state. I needed my old ID (got it), two proofs of current address (got one), insurance info(got it), registration and title(got them), to take a written exam(I'm sorry, come again?), around $200 for my plates (they could not produce an actual price for me) that would expire in June and another $20+ for my license. You know what? I'll keep my Ohio stuff going. It isn't worth the hassle for six months of living.

WHAT THE F*** IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE???
Except our landlords. They rock. Seriously. I will take them out to dinner before we evacuate this hole.
But this time I am not thinking what might be wrong with me this time? No. Not anymore.

For 28 years of my life, it has been a pledge in my heart to escape Ohio. Most of that 28 spent in Toledo, I thought the Midwest was in a terminal state. Flee to Texas, they are all about making money there. Jobs are bountiful. Or to the Atlantic or gulf coast for shipbuilding, the navy will always want ships. Anything that wasn't Ohio was good for me. Then we finally took that first step, out of Toledo and down to Columbus. Our goal was Austin TX. This was a good start.
Or was it?
Every day we were there, we felt more relaxed, more alive, more welcomed, and just happier.

A lot of you know, I am in no way a buckeye fan. I was happy to see their misery. In NW Ohio, I think the central Ohioans don't realize, there are some(and by some I mean ALOT) raging, blood thirsty, I would choose OSU over Christianity if the ultimatem arose and shoot Jesus if he didn't agree with me, crazy Buckeye fans (they shaped my dislike for the school as a child). If they ever declared an actual war, Michigan and Ohio State, to start at noon on the third Saturday in November, the war in NW Ohio would be over at midnight the night before, OSU fans would bathing in UM blood giggling like little schoolgirls.
This past week, I have constantly reintroducing myself in school, stating we moved here from Columbus OH. GIANT COLLECTIVE GROAN from each class.
Damn Purdon't Boilermakers.
So I come home and tell the wife about the collective groans from the classes and she ask why they did it.
Me- Purdon't is right down the street, and around here, they don't like our kind.
Her- 'Our kind'?
Me- Aw poopytrip.
Her- Was that a Freudian slip I just heard?
Me- ... Eff.
Well. There it is. I want to go back to Ohio. Badly. We no longer want Texas, or a coast. We want the heart of the heartland.
Guess I better get running. No, scratch that. Too cold and windy. P90X. Yeah buddy!

If you havent already, please visit /51pounds and like the page. The epic battle between the King and the Captain is about to heat up now that the holidays are over!